What gets me about this picture is not the fact that they look like a unicultural United Colors of Benetton ad that I would have found in Seventeen magazine as a teenager.
It's the hair.
I just...I can't...I'm not...
WHAT is up with the douchebag hair?
And I was all ready to make fun of them and their douchebag hair when suddenly...
I remembered the 90's:
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| Hi, I'm Brandon and I'm a know-it-all gambling addict, but chicks dig my hair. |
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| Hi, I'm Dylan and I'm a moody alcoholic/drug addict, but chicks dig my hair. |
While Brandon and Dylan certainly owned stock in a far less scandalous mile-high club, they had nothing on these guys:
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| We are totally hangin' tough. |
Apparently there's something about a young teenage girl that makes her oblivious to just how ridiculous the object of her 14 year old desire actually looks.
Exhibit A (or, "My Favorite New Kid"):
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| This is Joe. He's a Capricorn. He regularly pleaded with me, "Please don't go, girl," but he was competing with algebra homework, appointments for spiral perms, and getting my braces tightened. Pretty sure I ruined his whole world. |
However, at some point, this guy started to catch my eye (I don't know, it might have had something to do with hormones. Just a guess.):
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| This is Jordan. He promised that he'd be lovin' me forever, and boys don't ever lie about that stuff. Also, he started singing with his shirt unbuttoned while a ginormous fan tried to blow him off stage. It was very hot. |
So I suppose there's not much I can say about One Direction and their birds-could-nest-in-this-shit-and-you'd-never-even-know hair.
Except:
Style it while you've got it, boys.
'Cause it ain't yours to keep.
